Have Joy

“So I concluded there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can.” Ecclesiastes 3:12 NLT

This one sentence is so important in life. We must be not only be happy, but also have joy in good times and bad. We must enjoy ourselves and do things for ourselves. We must take care of ourselves. We must celebrate ourselves sometimes. Just be happy, there is nothing better than always having your joy. 

Recently a lot of great things have been happening for me and I only see more coming in the near future. Though the road to these successes have/may not be easy I’ve realized being happy and looking forward to better always helps. I get even happier when I see the fruits of my labor. 

The whole chapter, which all blessed me is below.

“For everything there is a season,

a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest. 

A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.

What do people really get for all their hard work? 

I have seen the burden God has placed on us all. 

Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end. 

So I concluded there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can. 

And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God.

And I know that whatever God does is final. Nothing can be added to it or taken from it. God’s purpose is that people should fear him. 

What is happening now has happened before, and what will happen in the future has happened before, because God makes the same things happen over and over again.

I also noticed that under the sun there is evil in the courtroom. Yes, even the courts of law are corrupt! 

I said to myself, “In due season God will judge everyone, both good and bad, for all their deeds.”
I also thought about the human condition—how God proves to people that they are like animals. 

For people and animals share the same fate—both breathe[a] and both must die. So people have no real advantage over the animals. How meaningless!

Both go to the same place—they came from dust and they return to dust.

For who can prove that the human spirit goes up and the spirit of animals goes down into the earth?

So I saw that there is nothing better for people than to be happy in their work. That is our lot in life. And no one can bring us back to see what happens after we die.”


Love Quotes

“16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” – John 3:16 King James Version (KJV)

“I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.”- Martin Luther King, Jr.

“Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.”- Mother Teresa

“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.”- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

“Love is life. And if you miss love, you miss life.”- Leo Buscaglia

“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.”- Mother Teresa

“Where there is love there is life.”- Mahatma Gandhi

“Don’t forget to love yourself.”- Soren Kierkegaard

“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”- Oscar Wilde

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”- Martin Luther King, Jr.

“I believe that every single event in life happens in an opportunity to choose love over fear.”- Oprah Winfrey

“I think what motivates people is not great hate, but great love for other people.”- Huey Newton

Ew, Periods

I’m sorry but we have to talk about that monthly pest. If you have never had a period before or just started having them, this post will benefit you. If you have been having periods for a while and would like to know some relief tips, this will benefit you as well. 

What is a period?

“Simply put: A period is when a woman’s body releases tissue it no longer needs. This tissue comes from the uterus, which is where a baby (fetus) can develop in the female body. Every month or so, the uterus lining gets thicker to prepare for a fertilized egg if the woman becomes pregnant. If the egg doesn’t get fertilized, that lining is released from the body as blood through the vagina. This monthly process is called menstruation or a period.” -Beinggirl.com    

This happens every 28 days.

Sanitation products: Pads (Napkins) or Tampons? 

It depends on what you are comfortable with. If you try a tampon and don’t like it that is fine. I would recommend never using pads with no wings because they shift and leave you with a mess. Also if you want a lot of comfort and don’t want to check for leakages so often, wear overnight pads all of the time. Overnight pads a super comfortable. Switch to thin pads near the end when your period is almost over (you will see a huge decrease in blood.) If you choose tampons try to wear a pantiliner with them in case your tampon leaks. 

What can I do?

You can do anything on your period. Some suggest swimming (with a tampon) is fine but I have never done it. I read if you exercise your pains will be reduced and you can cause your period to end faster (don’t know if this is actually true, but it’s always worth a try.)  Don’t let a little blood stop you!

Oh, the Pain!

This is the worst part of having a period in my opinion, but there are ways to reduce your pain. 

  • I always take an ibuprofen which helps with cramps and headaches. There are many medicines out there for menstrual cycles that will help the pain go away. Again, you have to find what’s best for you. 
  • Peppermint oil is the greatest during these times. If you rub a little on your stomach, you will feel sort of a numbness and a cooling sensation. The peppermint oil can also create a relaxed feeling.
  • Okay, this one might sound weird but drink pickle juice! I have no idea where I learned this one from, but it always works. You can also just eat pickles if you are not comfortable drinking the juice.
  • If you want a distraction from the pain buy (or have you parents buy) what you are craving. My go to is definitely potato chips and chocolate, then I crawl up in my bed and watch a movie. 
  • Bloating also causes a lot of pain during this time. Our bodies retain water during our cycles so I drink a lot before I start and don’t drink much during that time. 
  • Get a heated pad or take a warm shower.
  • Drink tea! Green tea is a go to.

Underwear Stains

A lot of women have “Period Panites” which are underwear that have been stained or are their most comfortable pairs. If you wake up and have leakage, don’t worry. Taking them in the shower with you to do a mini hand wash usually gets most to all of the blood off.


“Premenstrual syndrome is a complex of physical and emotional changes, including depression,irritability, appetite changes, bloating and water retention, breast soreness, and changes in muscular coordination, one or more of which may be experienced in the several days before the onset of menstrual flow.” – Dictionary.com. 

A lot of people will blame their attitude on PMS. Yes, it does cause mood changes, but control your period and your emotions do not let it control you! Carry a Snicker bar with you or something to keep you happy. 


It is important to stay and feel fresh and clean while you are on your period. 

  • There are wet wipes that you can carry with you in case of you leak or if you want to clean your vaginal area after changing your pad or tampon. 
  • I always carry a body spray with me just so I can feel more fresh. I may feel like crap, but I smell like I just came off of an island. 
  • Change your pad every few hours. This honestly depends on your flow, but I would suggest having 3-4 for each day. I don’t use tampons but experts say the same for those as well. 
  • While showering and bathing, there is something that prevents blood flow. Take your choice of a sanitation product and a pair of underwear with you to the bathroom. Place the pad in the underwear before you get in the shower so you won’t leak blood everywhere. As soon as you dry off you can put the underwear on. 
  • There are sprays made by Summer’s Eve and Vagisil that also come in handy. Using them on your period is your choice. Again, not everyone is the same when it comes to periods. 

Hopefully everyone got a tip or two out of this post that they can use. Not every girl has a parent to teach them these things so share this information if you can. Girls, don’t be afraid! This is a natural process; you will get used to it and most importantly get through it!

The Community (Jocelyn Hinton)

I pray for my peers and my elders
And the children going to school to learn the basics
And the unborn for my own.

I haven’t had the dreams of becoming the mother I once wanted to be
But I always have the goals of reaching lost souls.
How? You may ask me but never fully know
It’s my peers, elders, children and the unborn we still have left.

I have always had this caring heart. I’ve been told by the non factors to my life that I was selfish but just like me at that same time, they weren’t seeing the bigger picture.

So I ask myself time and time again
Jocelyn why must you have the heart God carries you in?
It’s not about finding love
Or being the guidance to love
But loving yourself that is the key.

You wonder why you cry inside
Because you haven’t dug deep
In your heart.
Haven’t dug deep in your soul.
You gotta understand that people will respect you when they see how much you respect yourself.
Go around saying God bless but when’s the last time you prayed for yourself?

It’s my peers, elders, children and the unborn we still have left
We as a black community need to come together and teach to the lost souls and preach to the loved ones and not shoot to kill and laugh because of trickery.

Raise one another up to see the fire God has put in every single one of us.
Know that no matter what you go through he’s going to love you where you’re at.

Because it’s my peers, elders, children and the unborn we still have left.

Dark Skin, RED Lip

One day last week I was on Twitter and saw something that said “every black person on Twitter needs to rt this at least once, RIP queen, you won’t be forgotten.” In the photo below that text there were two pictures of Miss. Karyn Washington with a caption that read, “Karyn Washington, founder of ‘For Brown Girls’ and the ‘Dark Skin, Red Lips’ project has died at the tender age of 22. And this was not a natural death. This was an apparent suicide. Karyn, who dedicated herself to the uplifting of dark-skinned black girls and women, and worked so hard that they would have a sense of well-being, was struggling with depression and mental illness, and was unable to extend the love she gave to others to herself.” *Eyerolls to the second part of their caption.*

Immediately after reading this tweet I began to look up For Brown Girls and Karyn Washington. The first piece of information I found was an article that featured a video from one of her closest friends. Her friend talked about how loving and sweet Karyn was. She also confirmed Karyn’s death was not caused by self hate or “not extending the love she gave to others to herself.” Karyn’s mother passed away from cancer which seems to have had a major impact on her. (If you are struggling with any suicidal thoughts please call the national hotline at 1 (800) 273-8255 or reach out to me. It doesn’t matter if you know me or not, we can talk.) Articles on her death were posted everywhere I tried to search for For Brown Girls. Rumors and people being plain nasty should not overshadow the great work Karyn did!

I want to celebrate her life and everything she did because that work made a way for myself and others with similar missions! Karyn’s work inspires me. I would be grateful to have even half of the impact she had on black females.

The mission of FBG posted on their tumblr page is “www.forbrowngirls.com, an organization dedicated to celebrating the darker shades of brown while combatting colorism” (Colorism is described as “prejudice or discrimination against individuals with a dark skin tone, typically among people of the same ethnic or racial group.” – Google Dictionary.) “and promoting self love! FBG was founded in 2011 by Karyn Washington.” It looks like the website is now owned by someone else but I would still encourage everyone to check out http://forbrowngirls.tumblr.com/!

Karyn Washington, Founder of FBG and The #DarkSkinRedLips Project

The mission the #DarkSkinRedLip Project posted on their tumblr page is “Breaking Barriers and Building Confidence!” is the tag-line of ForBrownGirls’ latest ongoing online campaign that invites women with darker skin complexions to submit and showcase a photo of them rocking a red lip (www.darkskinredlip.com). Since April, the organization has been promoting this project through social media and word of mouth to help put an end to the notion that women of a darker hue don’t look attractive wearing bright colors, in particular, red lipstick. Along with abolishing that stigma, the project will serve as inspiration to any girl or woman who have given into this stereotype and shied away from wearing a red lip. In viewing such images, a darker skinned girl who is hesitant to try a red lip will find the confidence to step out of her comfort zone, disregarding the opinion of anyone else. The project has received much support and we look forward to reaching our goal of having 1,000+ women participate.” Find more at http://darkskinredlip.tumblr.com/!

Love the skin you’re in. I don’t care what anyone says about you, you are beautiful. (Read our Beauty Quotes post!) In order to continue Karyn’s efforts I encourage everyone to post a photo of themselves wearing their favorite red lipstick or saying why you love your skin tone.

Warrick Dunn: Football and Philanthropy

“Because I have been able to build a reputation as a talented player, I have been able to build futures. Because I am able to play, I am able to make a difference. Because I have been blessed with a talent, I also have been given a responsibility.” – Warrick Dunn.

These words are from an ex all-pro NFL player who took philanthropy to another level. Yes, most athletes do have charities but they do not always put much time and love into them.

Dunn’s service has a purpose. His mother’s murder inspired him to keep her dream alive through others. Her dream was to own a home as a single parent. Homes for the Holidays has helped 147 families find homes.

“Betty’s Hope empowers youth to manage grief using education, tools and resources… Loss includes death, divorce, deployment, incarceration, natural disaster, illness and relocation or significant changes in a youth’s life.” This program has been implemented in 23 schools!

Warrick Dunn is also one of the founders of Athletes for Hope. This organization “helps professional athletes and the community develop their passion for philanthropy.”

All quoted information has been retrieved from http://www.wdc.org/about-us/ and http://www.warrickdunn.com/bio.html. Everyone is encouraged to visit these sites.

Thank you, Mr. Dunn for your service!

Black History Month

Black History Month was created by Carter G. Woodson, who originally named it Negro History Week in 1926. There was just too much to celebrate so it became Black History Month in 1976. Since Frederick Douglass and Abraham Lincoln have birthday’s in February, this month was chosen.
Since it is the last day of Black History Month, let’s look at 40 who have influenced our lives and culture:

  1. Sarah Rector- One of the richest African Americans in the early 1900’s (at the age of 10.)
  2. Queen Mother Nana Yaa Asantewaa- Queen mother of Ghana who fought against the British empire.
  3. Ella Baker- Worked behind the scenes during the Civil Rights Movement. Rosa Park’s mentor and worked beside W.E.B Dubois.
  4. Nelson Mandela- Former President of Africa who worked relentlessly to end apartheid.
  5. Diane Nash – Freedom Writer, SNCC member, and Selma voting rights committee member.
  6. Septima Poinsette Clark- “Grandmother of the Civil Rights Movement.”
  7. Nat Turner- Led a slave rebellion in Virginia.
  8. Frederick Douglass- A former slave who lead the abolitionist movement.
  9. Claudette Colvin- Civil Rights Pioneer. Refused to give up her seat before Rosa Parks at the age of 15.
  10. Harriet Tubman- An underground railroad conductor who led slaves to freedom.
  11. Daisy Bates- Newspaper Owner; this paper was known as the voice of the civil rights movement. Served on the Johnson Administration. Worked to reduce poverty.
  12. Madame C.J. Walker- Creator of some of the first black hair products and cosmetics.
  13. President Barack Obama- The first Black President of the United States, and the winner of a Nobel Peace Prize.
  14. Nina Simone- Singer who broke many barriers. Civil Rights Activist.
  15. Michael Jackson- The King of Pop; a black music pioneer.
  16. Benjamin Banneker- Author of Benjamin Banneker’s almanac.
  17. Sojourner Truth- “Ain’t I am Woman”, abolitionist and women’s rights leader.
  18. Hallie Quinn Brown- Educator, writer, and activist who organized the Colored Women’s League.
  19. Phylicia Rashad- First African American actress to win a Tony for a leading role (A Raisin in the Sun.)
  20. Ava DuVernay- The director of the film Selma, with her own barbie doll!
  21. Rev, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.- A non-violent leader pivotal to the Civil Rights Movement.
  22. Langston Hughes- Poet and activist who wrote about black life in the early 1900’s.
  23. Josh Gibson- A Hall of Fame, Negro League baseball catcher.
  24. Ella Fitzgerald- The First Lady of Song, Jazz singer.
  25. Maya Angelou- Prominent poet, activist, and leader.
  26. Medgar Evers- Civil Rights Activist who worked on Voting Rights.
  27. Dorothy Dandridge- The first African American woman to be nominated for the Best Actress Academy Award.
  28. Colin Powell- First African American Secretary of State; Retired Four-Star General; The only African American to serve of the Joints Chief of Staff.
  29. MarShawn McCarrel- #BlackLivesMatter Activist
  30. Don Cornelius- Creator and Host of Soul Train.
  31. Angela Davis- Professor, Activist, and writer who was a member of the US Communist Party.
  32. Hattie McDaniel-The first African American to win an Oscar (1940.)
  33. WEB DuBois- American Civil Rights Activist, professor, author, sociologist, and much more.
  34. Viola Davis-Actress/ Elegant Role Model for Black females.
  35. Dr. Patricia Bath-First African American doctor to receive a medical patent.
  36. Mrs. F.E.W Harper- Abolitionist and women’s rights activist.
  37. Maxine Waters- Congresswoman “one of the most powerful women in politics.”
  38. Hydeia Broadbent- Born with HIV, but she did not let that hold her as she is a motivator; Humanitarian.
  39. The Greensboro 4- NC A&T students who performed the sit in at Woolworth’s
  40. Eric Holder-The first African American Attorney General of the United States

There are so so so so so so so so so so so so many more names that could be added to this list because there has always been #BlackExcellence! Let’s keep it going!

A Girl’s Guide to Shopping

Get through your next shopping trip with these 5 simple tips!

  • There is nothing wrong with Clearance. For as long as I can remember I have only shopped in Clearance sections. I cannot remember the last time I paid over $5 for a shirt and over $10 for a pair of pants/skirts. There’s no shame in my game because:
    1. It’s my money, so no one can say anything unless they are paying for my clothes.
    2. So many clothes are overpriced. They could have cost $3 to produce , while you are being charged $55.
    3. I can usually stock up for a different season. In example: Once spring fashions come out most winter clothes are put on clearance to make room. I buy clothes for next winter for 50% or less than they were four weeks earlier.
    4. I have so many clothes.
  • Don’t be bound to sizes. I have so many different clothing items that range in all sizes but they all fit me. Don’t worry if there’s something in the store that you cannot fit, go up a size no one cares. Sizes range by store and the company that made the clothes. Be comfortable. If someone has something to say just look at them, smile, and continue to do what you were doing.
  •  I was in JC Penny a few weeks ago and heard a mom telling her daughter “You’ve tried on three sizes. Obviously nothing is going to fit, you’re too big let’s leave.” this girl had to be 120 pounds and around 14 years old. I’m pretty sure if her mom wasn’t trying to stuff her in a 5 year old’s outfit she would have been fine. Her self confidence could have been ruined that day, don’t let anyone do that to you. In your teenage years and probably after too your body undergoes a lot of changes and your weight may fluctuate. It’s okay! Buy whatever makes you comfortable. If you have to venture into the petite/plus size section so be it. A number on a tag, nor a scale for that matter does not define you.
  • Take your time. I take so much time shopping because I want to make sure I am getting everything I want and the best deals. One thing I have learned is that there is usually the same item in another store and sometimes it is cheaper. Shop around and take your time.
  •  If someone looks at you like you like you are stealing or following you around because you are taking your time or have visited the same section more than once it is okay to say something to them (in a nice tone). As a tactic to keep customers from stealing a sales associate may continuously ask if you need help looking for anything. If you get asked more than twice say, no I am taking my time shopping, nothing will be stolen and I would greatly appreciate it if you left me alone, then smile. If you are feeling uncomfortable reiterate the fact that you are not stealing, do not like being harassed, and will not be purchasing anything from that store and exit.
  • Set a Budget. There is never a time where I have spent a whole paycheck while shopping but everyone can get a little ahead of themselves sometimes. Before you leave to go shopping set aside the amount you want to spend and only spend that (or stay in a range). If you are going to the mall it is a good idea to factor in how much your food will cost if you eat there. Developing these habits will benefit you in the long run.
  • Have fun! Shopping can be annoying and make you tired but I always imagine how I will put my outfits together. I already know that I’m slaying my outfit three weeks from now. Shopping is a time for you to treat yourself. If you don’t like to shop in clearance like me that’s okay buy what you like.
  • (Remember you do not always need a label or name brand. There is no way I am paying $200 extra dollars to have someone’s initials on my bag! Funny story actually: When I was in the 9th and 10th grade everyone and their mom was wearing Aeropostale. I refused to wear it because: 1. I could not afford it and I wasn’t going to ask my mom to buy me clothes with a word on it 2. Everyone was walking around looking like clones and I refused to be like them. I don’t mind standing against the crowd. Now, everyone has a bunch of Aeropostale clothes that they can’t wear because it went out of style or they can’t fit them while I still have some of the same plain t shirts from 10th grade.)

The next time you go shopping remember these tips and let us know if they work for you!!

Top 5 Affordable Nude Lip Colors

Finding nude lipsticks to match our skin tones is not always easy. Here are 5 very affordable nude lipsticks that look great on everyone: 

Colourpop: Embellish $6 Colorpop.com. This one is a little dark but it’s a beautiful color! 

WetNWild Megaslicks: Caffeine Fix $3 Walgreens. (Looks great on top of a brown lip liner.)

Nyx Lingerie: Honeymoon $7 Ulta.

Nyx Lingerie: Teddy $7 Ulta.

Colourpop: Kae $6 Colourpop.com 


Bonus: Nyx Intensive Butter Gloss: Cinnamon Roll. Absolute favorite lip gloss!


Being good stewards over our money is a must. Not the best at this? Me either, which is why budgeting is soooooo helpful. Budgeting can help us reach our goals, not feel like we are throwing away our money, and prevent us from being stressed when it is time to pay bills.

Read the words from Jesus:

Luke 14:28-30  “Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it?29 For if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule you, 30 saying, ‘This person began to build and wasn’t able to finish.’

See? There it is. Below is a sample of a simple budget sheet I made on Microsoft Word. It took less than 4 minutes! (To make a table go to the insert tab and press table).

Budget (Bi-Weekly)

     Paycheck ($) : 300


Item Amount
 Rent  $145
 Tithes  $30
 Food  $40
 Phone Bill  $25
Extra Spending Money  $60

How has budgeting helped you? Tried this sheet and it worked? Let us know in the comments! 🖤